Author: SK

As I had explained earlier, I recently found the back issues of The Fourth Estate, the erstwhile IITM journal. The last two of them had stuff written by me. Both written about “contemporary” events (events which were contemporary at the time of writing). Both really badly written. And both utterly scandalous.

At first I couldn’t believe that I could’ve written so badly. However, a little analysis revealed that these were my first couple of attempts at writing. Before 2003, I had probably written not more than a page outside of my exam answer scripts. Then, she suggested that writing might help me “cool down”. My first piece came in the April 03 issue of the Fourth Estate. A wholly one-sided view of institute elections. The second was in the January 04 issue. About some robotics thing. I couldn’t go beyond the first couple of lines of my article so I don’t know what it’s all about.

All said and done, a portion of my resume reads “Regular contributor to IITM publications such as The Fourth Estate and Total Perspective Vortex“.

just back from a party. was a rockin’ one. and i got drunk. however, i don’t think i did anything “interesting”. just pranced around, put a little senti on people and stuff. thatz all. and i’d prewarned neha that i’m getting drunk. only “interesting” thing that i did was that i started making out with a pillar a couple of times!

feel sober now. just half an hour back i had a whole 500ml bottle of frooti. and just drank lots of water. hope i dont’ wake up with a hangover.

Of late, my processor speed seems to have increased big time. However, lack of sufficient memory means that all this extra speed is going waste.

In fact, insufficient memory is causing data overload in the existing memory and has led to heavy loss of data. Classic case of improvement in one component of the system DESTROYING the whole system rather than improving it!

Wanted: An external memory; In other words, i need a sounding board for my ideas. Would help if i could get a girlfriend who’s really nice to talk to.

For the last 23 odd years I’ve lived a fairly good life. So good that I’ve managed to carry on pretty well despite making a thousand mistakes. And every time I sit down and think of the past, I remember yet another mistake I made somewhere, sometime. And I feel so silly. In fact, most of the mistakes I’ve made have been of a really silly nature. If I travel back the appropriate ‘distance’, I could so easily correct it! And of late I’ve made it a point to slap myself once everytime I discover some ancient mistake. Hopefully that way I can get rid of some flab from my face!

Whoever said a good life is one where one has no regrets!

Earlier today, I happened to locate back issues of the fourth estate. Started reading it and have since gone on a maajor senti trip. And I couldn’t stop laughing when I wrote that article about Elections 03. Can’t believe I could indulge in that level of slander. However, that was my first ever attempt at writing, so i’m quite senti about that article.

As I ploughed through the fourth estate, I found cue‘s article on Saarang 03 and have become even more senti. Socially that has been my most successful saarang. Though I didn’t make any money in that, I would regard it as my best Saarang so far. Monetarily, however, Saarang 04 was best, when I won two quizzes.

Speaking of Saarang, I’m going next week for Saarang 06. Hope I am able to be more successful than 04 (in terms of performance) and 03 (in terms of socializing).

sniff sniff

The IIMC campus is so far away from the city that we were apprehensive of getting a taxi early in the morning in order to catch our flight back. A couple of friends from IIMC gave us the number of a supposedly reliable call taxi but we didn’t want to take any chances.

I had planned out an elaborate post but have now lost the enthu. Here is what I manage of it.

Toad had told us that we can find some good eating places at Park Street. Reached there by another rickety taxi around 9. Most places turned out to be pubs. There were only a couple of restaurants around. Went to the cheaper one. Turned out to be a bit of a disappointment. However, the paan proved to be good compensation.

Calcutta airport is much better than the private airlines terminal at Delhi. At midnight, there are quite a few shops open, there is a pay phone available and you get something more for the stomach than just coffee. There is also a i-way outlet which is open. And the security guard is very courteous.

After taking care to keep an alarm for 5 am, we sprawl on some sofa sets in the airport. 3 hours of sleep the preceding night and the long train journey preceding that means that the next thing I know it’s 5 am already. And unlike the Delhi airport, there is a buzz already. People are already pouring in. Announcements are on. Some air deccan flights are late. One has even been cancelled. We are happy we are flying jet.

Our flight is on time but we are shocked to see a long line in front of the Bangalore Airport. It’s for the pre-paid autos and we go join them. The guy at the counter (a cop) seems so slow in writing out the slips. Soon there is a traffic jam out there as the queue at the queue blocks the entrance to the airport! Finally a few more cops arrive and ask all autos to put meter and disperse the crowd.

This is so different from the smooth experience one has at teh Railway STation. There, the guy at the counter has a comp and churns out slips in a matter of seconds. They charge a nominal Re. 1 per auto as “maintenance charges”. And the thing runs like a dream.

Coming to think of it, the booth at the station is run by the auto-drivers’ union while the one at the airport is run by cops! It is interesting to note that the unions are doing a much better job of it while we would normally believe that cops would be better at it!

The reasons could be many. One, the auto drivers trust the union representative and simply accepts the price that is put on the ticket. Also, the fact that it is computerised means that the auto driver knows what he is getting into. I have observed autodrivers at the airport arguing with the cop at the booth regrding the fare that is put on the slip. And causing a lot of delay. Then, of course, at the cop-run booth it is a different guy doing the job at different times. And they are not specialists at the job and have to look up the books every now and then. On the other hand the unions have employed full-time booth operators which leads to an increase in efficiency.

Moral of the story – unions can sometimes do good work.

For the record, we reach hostel around 11 and carry the trophy back to my room. Sadly no one notices us. I am so pleased with myself about the performance in Cal that i declare a holiday for myself and bunk all classes.

Had two midterms over the last couple of days. Both administered by the same prof. Both multiple choice questions type. And I walked out of both in fifteen minutes.

No, this time the questions were not repeated from any previous papers. At least I don’t think they were – I haven’t seen the previous papers. However, the nature of questions made these exams in to a big farce.

Yesterday you were asked to define stuff. And given four choices which were, at best, rewordings of each other. All the questions were truly “chimps”. I just extended the Linus sequence to multiple choice questions and did the exam.

Today’s was even better. Most questions consisted of some statement with four choices below it, each choice being a probable opinion on the statement. And you had to choose one of the four opinions. God only knows what the prof’s opinions on these things are. How is it an exam when you are supposed to know what the prof thinks of something? It is ridiculous, to say the least.

And then you have these people here who are singing paeans of the prof saying he’s put such a wonderful exam. Wonderful my foot. There are so many better ways of testing students while not forcing them to study. And the prof makes sure the exam turns into a lottery.

I know a couple of IIMB profs who read this journal. I hope something is done about it so that future batches don’t suffer (now I’m making the motherhood statements). First the repeated papers. And now this kind of farce. I can’t believe I’m spending 2 years and 3 lakh for this!

The taxis of Calcutta are yellow. Jarring yellow from top to bottom. All of them ambassadors. I heard a story that Hindustan Motors has made the commie government there pass an order that no other brand can be used as a taxi. Apparently that is the only way they can continue production.

Needless to say, most taxis (at least everything I travelled in) were broken down. And if I say that the driving was rash, I would be making an understatement. The guy would sometimes overtake by going over the divider onto the other side of the road and then coming back in front of the other guy over the divider. One thing I noticed there was that the driver never switched to first gear! He would start in second gear even with five passengers!

Within a minute of entering Cal, I was witness to a brawl on the street. The taxi in front of ours hit a parked Omni. And that guy came and pulled out this guy and started beating him. We were going in front of a slum and people from there joined in the beating up. And you have the drivers of the other taxis on that road joining the other side! And no one seems to give a damn that there is a huge line of cars that have been held up and soon tehre could be a jam!

And there we are in the taxi, having arrived in cal a whole seven hours behind schedule. We know that the quizfest would’ve already started but our driver is busy beating up some slum guy! Finally he returns and more than makes up for lost time with some real rash driving.

It is 1330 by the time we arrive in Joka, and the finals of the business quiz are about to start. Sehwag, who reached by flight the previous day, has qualified all by himself. Dravid and I join him there. Yuvraj and Kaif are off for “SSS” (shave, shit, shampoo).

The quizzes go on non-stop until 4 in the morning, with a small break for dinner which we thulp at the IIMC mess. The food appeared decent but I guess that was because we were having proper food after a gap of 48 hours. On the whole, however, their mess sucks in comparison to ours. The whole campus pales in comparison to ours. Hostels are bad. Let us not even talk about the loos. Things are scattered around. It is too far from the city. Too many mosquitoes. Of course, there are the lakes and the greenery. Still that doesn’t make up for the bad hostels.

Coming back to quizzing, the biz-quiz goes pretty well for us. The quiz isn’t too great. Some good fundaes here and there but there is a lot of inconsistency. However, I won’t crib since we won that quiz.

The movie quiz is downright bad. Too many sitters. Too many peters. If you miss one question you stand to lose a lot. However, I am proud of my working out “lock, stock and two smoking barrels” from the poster. We come joint third, tied with the other IIMB team.

The sports quiz prelims are non-descript. Sehwag is useless when it comes to sports so it’s upto Dravid and me. Crack some decent ones but we could’ve done better. There is this bad feeling in our stomachs that we might not qualify.

Our skill-sets are reversed when it comes to lit-art. Dravid and I are akin to tailenders in that. Prelims go good for us. Even I manage to crack a few. has done a damn good job of the quiz. If I can be kept interested through the length of a lit-arts quiz (the finals started at midnight) the quiz can be nothing but good! Hats off to .

The finals remind one of the 1975 India-Windies test at Madras. Sehwag is like Vishwanath. Cracks this splendid 97* with just Bedi (Ganguly) and Chandra (Dravid) for company. Dravid hits some sixes though. Going back to his childhood to crack Mahabali Shaata. Amazing quiz on the whole. We win.

The sci-tech quiz is also largely good but a few sitters here and there spoil it. I crack my 144 in that but it is not enough for us to win. We come second to the other IIMB team. However, I am happy I’m back in some semblance of form.

Day 2 starts at 9 am. The India quiz is cancelled because the quizmaster is not prepared! The IIMC chaps come up with an “unofficial quiz”. Decent quiz but it’s hurriedly put together. We miss a couple of easy ones and come 5th. Sports quiz finals follow. Largely good but some sitters spoil it. We come fourth.

There are two styles of quizzing in India. In the south, it is more logical reasoning. Of course knowledge is important. But most things can be worked out. In calcutta, quizzes are more knowledge-oriented. Very little to work out. And they try playing to the gallery. Results in bad quizzes.

The general quiz is open. Done by Gautam Bimani of ESPNStar. Prelims is good. Odyssey level. We qualify. An interesting thing about calcutta quizzing is everyone comes dressed up. There are people in formals. Or party-wear. This, I learn, is because most quizzes there take place in five star hotels or in pubs. Unlike us southerners who believe in simple living and high thinking.

In the finals our man shows his true colors. Turns out to be the “Lawrence of Kolkata” (for details contact Dravid). If you call that quizzing, I can set a quiz in one evening. Go to one website where you find photos of celebrities when they were kids. You have 10 questions. Find another website with photos of star-couples. Another 10. And it was so unprofessionally done. Files hadn’t been named appropriately and gave out the answers. The QM didn’t know properly where the files were stored. Probably one of the worst quizzes I’ve been to. Come last in the finals.

In spite of the reverses on the second day, IIMB won the constructors championship. We had 88 points, much more than the sum total of second placed IIMA (38) and third placed IITM (30 something). We are to be given this lovely glass trophy. By who else but the great QM Gautam Bimani. We take it all round IIMC and take photos with it.

I win a total of Rs. 8000. And more importantly, have another resume bullet point! And I’ll get footage and be a hero back in IIMB. To paraphrase Muhammad Ali,

To make IIMB the greatest is our goal
So we beat the amdavadis, madrasis, kanpurias and bongs
And for IIMB we won the trophy of Gold.
The Greeks said we’re better than the Indian Cricket team of Old.