rebuilding relationships…

at several points of time in life, you end up in the unpleasant situation where your relationship with someone has hit the pits. there is a cold war on, and you haven’t spoken to him/her for a while. and you want to try and re-build the relationships. a few pertinent observations related to that…


1. You are uniformly better off by being friends with someone (irrespective of who it is) than being not-so-friendly.

2. The downside of rebuilding a relationship is capped – the relationship is probably already pretty screwed up so you don’t have much more to lose. So you better try.

3. Re-building a relationship takes a considerable amount of effort and heartburn for both parties. You should be prepared for that

4. If you initiate proceedings, be prepared for the thing to get off to a Ravi Shastri-level slow start.

5. There might be a chance that the counterparty may not be very responsive. Think of it this way, “if he/she responds, good for both of you; if he/she doesn’t care, he/she most probably doesn’t desrve your friendship”

6. The joy of having successfully rebuilt a relationship is tremendous. And you will usually end up at a higher plane than just before the misunderstanding.

And yeah, the fact that i’m sayin so much about rebuilding must also mean that i’m quite good at screwing up relationships… 🙁

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