this post was written yesterday when blog was down, so posting it now.
Bob: Damn, I’ve to go to Eve’s party tonight
Alice: Oh, but I thought you actually wanted to go?
Bob: Nope, I have other things to do and it’s inconvenient to go. But if I don’t go, Eve will get hurt.
Alice: I remember you saying the same thing the last time Eve invited you for a party.
Bob: That’s true, but I really care about Eve and don’t want to hurt her.
Alice: Tell me, have you ever told Eve that you don’t particularly enjoy her parties?
Bob: Nope, she would get hurt if I said that.
Alice: So you’ve never told her that you don’t enjoy it. And you’ve always accepted her invitations.
Bob: That’s true.
Alice: So how should Eve know that these parties are inconvenient for you? If she were to somehow get to know, maybe next time she may not invite you, and spare you the trouble of boring yourself at her party.
Bob: But she would get hurt if she were to somehow find out that I don’t enjoy her parties!
Alice: That is your problem, then. You don’t have any right to crib about her parties!